Can I Have That?

There's an idea I've been dwelling on for a while now, and I think it's time has come. I'm going to write letters to various companies, asking if I can have one of their products, "just 'cause". I think it will be in the visage of a form letter, and be phrased like this:

Hey,

I was wondering, can I have one of your __________? I think they might be cool. If you have one that's kinda broken and you can't sell, could you give it to me? Or if you want to give me a new one, that's fine, too.

Thanks,
Mike

The idea came about when I was thinking about buying a new computer. Both of my machines are getting long in the tooth, and it's time for an upgrade. But being an Apple user, upgrading two machines is not cheap. So I figured, maybe I'll just ask for one. Maybe I'll take the letters and responses and make a book out of it, kind of like Ted Nancy's great book, Letters From A Nut. And if no one responds, and it's just a collection of form letters to companies, so much the better.

Basically, my idea is that someone in each company will think this request is so funny, unique, or harmless that I'd get a few free things out of it. Obviously, I'd like for those companies to be Apple, Canon, and Ferrari, but even if it's Pepsi, Hanes, and Snickers I'm still saving myself a trip to the Walgreens.

I think the ultimate letter will be the one I write to the United States Postal Service:

Hey,

I was wondering, can I have one of your stamps? I think they might be cool. If you have one that's kinda broken and you can't sell, could you give it to me? Or if you want to give me a new one, that's fine, too.

Thanks,
Mike