Scientific Study

How Much Starbucks Coffee Does It Take To Burn Your Skin?

Hypothesis: I'd estimate it takes "Not too much" to burn oneself, and estimate the lower limits of this arbitrary amount to be in the range of 1-2ml.

Method:
1. Purchase a cup of Starbucks Americano
2. Walk with it through Wrigleyville
3. Spill progressive amounts on arm while walking
4. Notate how burning sensation relates to amount spilled.

Findings:
I was surprised by how little it takes to create a burn; my estimate of 1-2ml was in fact, very high. Turns out one molecule of Americano can generate 2nd degree burns on contact, 3rd degree if left unsmothered for longer than 6 nanoseconds.

Recommendations:
Avoid Starbucks Americano at all costs. If you must drink Americano due to dependance or elitism, wear long-sleeved sweatshirts, and protective slickers if possible.