crumbelievable

Yeah, it's old news, and yeah every blog on earth has found it funny enough to mention, but I'd like to add another layer to the cake of mystery that is Karft's "Crumbelievable®" campaign for their cheese crumb products.

For those who don't know, Kraft recently released a bag of cheese crumbs, and the commercial for them uses a re-imagined version of EMF's hit, "Unbelievable". Yes, they changed the lyrics to "You're Crumbelievable®". Something so awful would be rather funny if the Kraft people would play it as such, but they're deadly serious about making people think their cheese crumbs are, in fact, crumbelievable®. The poor singer packs tons of emotion into that line; "You're so crumbelieveable®, OH!", trying his hardest to make you forget what an awful, awful idea the commercial is.

You know how sometimes you'll hear the studio musician hired to re-do an instantly recognizable song for a commercial, and you swear you can hear their soul dying? Like the Citizen's Bank commercial that redid "Speeding Motorcycle", or the National City one where they redid "I'm Special"? It's like that. Note, the famous Hootie Burger King commercial does not count, as it was an instant parody of itself and it looked like everyone knew that going into it.

But that's all old news. What I want to add is this: You may have noticed I didn't link to an online version of the ad. Given the "viral ad" craze, every single commercial ever released pops up on the internet within a minute and a half of it's first airing. Yet the Crumbelieveable® spot is nowhere to be found, which leads me to believe that Kraft Foods is deeply, deeply ashamed of it. And what's not to be ashamed of? The lyrics, please:

The things you crave, that big cheese taste that blows you away
The things you crave, that's what I eat them more
The things you crave, that big cheese taste that blows you away
The things you crave, they're crumbelievable (oh)